Driving in the car, I feel a hand take mine and squeeze. I am anxious and he can see it. “How are you feeling?” He knows the answer but it’s something to break the silence. “I feel sick.” He nods. “I feel sick because I’m terrified it won’t be what I want to hear.” He…
Category: AUTISM
The yin and yang of the week that was
So this is how my week has been: We withdrew Master J from school. Only a term before the end of VCE, only a term before the end of his entire 13 year career. We withdrew him because he could take it no longer. He could no longer endure the place that promised us that they…
Autism, the puzzle piece that refuses to fit, and thank goodness for that
“I’m dropping out of school!” The words ring in my ears. Desperation. Hurt. Anger. Anguish. I see all of these things when I look into his eyes. “Love…” “Don’t talk mum, I am DROPPING OUT OF SCHOOL!” He has reached implosion point. “I’m 18, I don’t fucking well have to stay in school.” It’s true,…
Autism – we need to ask a different question
“You do know I am the next step in evolution?” Master J says this to me often. He hates it when we watch programs on TV that talk of eradicating autism, like autistic children are the scourge of society. “Why is it that people love X-Men, Mum, want them to win, despite their mutations, but…
Be patient. Be kind. If you cannot, say nothing.
Master J is struggling. Exams are looming and English is proving a bigger problem than we ever imagined. The limitations of autism are increasingly evident. Things that come naturally to us neuro-typicals are an enormous struggle for him. Language, with all of its complexities, its nuances, its foibles, pass him by. He lives in his…
THE FIGHTING FOR OUR AUTISTIC CHILDREN NEVER ENDS
I’m at it again. I have turned into THAT mother, again. The one where when teachers see me coming, they groan, roll their eyes and wish to goodness the world would open up and swallow them whole. Or me, maybe they want the world to swallow me whole. Either way, I am THAT mother. Last year,…
There is always hope
When JC was diagnosed with autism we had no idea what the future may hold but more importantly we had no real structured plan going forward. We had no idea of what to expect as he would travel through puberty. I have no idea if this is because he was diagnosed at a hospital more…
Migraines, ID theft and Accidents
I was first introduced to buddhism when I was 14 years old. My boyfriend’s mother was a strong follower and on my first visit to their house she told me that buddha had four noble truths. The first, she said, was that life is difficult. I was 14. And Buddha was clearly wrong. At least he…
Shopping and the Status Quo
“Can you hear the dogs?” I open my eyes from a deep sleep. “I didn’t hear them.” Dee gets out of bed. I hear him yell at the dogs to go back to sleep. I wonder why I haven’t heard them. Am I going deaf? I really need to phone that specialist. Dee climbs back…
The things we do for vanity
After a slow start to the morning, Dee’s dad calls to see if I would like to meet them for coffee. It is growing into a nice day outside, so I figure why not. JC said he doesn’t want to go. Of course not. I get showered and dressed, desperately trying to ignore the growing…