The chrysalis of life

I’m undergoing a change.

It’s been an awfully long time coming.  Slow, like a snail, gliding, unfurling and expanding inside my brain.

It feels like I have been in a chrysalis for so long now.

As I break my way to the surface, I find myself unsteady, wobbly even, with my new emerging wings.

It feels so good, refreshing, to breathe air that is not tainted or toxic.

The lizard in my brain has a master now.  It struggles against that control, angry, full of turmoil, and rage.

But I sing to it.  I breathe on it.

I breathe on it.

In.  Out.  In.  Out.

It quietens, its breathing steadies, its anger subsides.

A new freedom.

A new expression.

It feels so good.

I have no idea where this new path will take me.  But I don’t care.  I am happy to skip along the stepping stones, across the surface of the water.  I do not need to know what lies beneath, or ahead.  I just need to put my one foot in front of another as I make my way from here to there.

From here to there.

No destination.

Simply a journey.

From here to there.

There is so much freedom in this place.  This moment.  This wonderful colourful moment.  Not grey.  Not dark.

Light.

Everything had to happen.  Everything has led me to this place.

Everything has helped to grow my wings.

I know that now.

I no longer fight it.

Everything was just another pebble – many pebbles – across my pond of life.

I look back at Everything.

I can leave you behind now, I say.  I can say goodbye.

I thank Everything, as it stretches out behind me – rough, undulating, weblike, confused.  You have served me well, I say, but now I must continue without you.

I am ready to forge new paths.  I am ready to look not forward, but just at the pebble in this moment.

I am ready to enjoy the simplicity of the journey.

I am ready.

I unfurl my wings, so new, so vulnerable.  They feel strong.  I imagine the mythical angel and how strong he must feel.

I arch my back, stretch.

I look forward.

And so my new journey begins.

Until next time,